ghosting

You're the one that appears in my dreams. And it appears you're just cleaning up the mess somebody else has left.

you haunt me. i wish i could say i hate it. part of me surely does. but part of me doesn't know how to live without it. part of me needs it in order to keep moving forward. why? i don't know. because the secrets will always live inside myself and no one else.

i like you. maybe, i'm just like you. though sometimes i feel as though i'm holding something that needs to be let go. what it is, i don't know. it's intangible, but a feeling of hope.

this hollow feeling never subsides even when i'm distracted from the thoughts and feelings, it's constantly looming over me. and then when something reminds me of it, and you, it comes crashing down with such impact, sometimes i don't know how to keep moving forward.

I come and go, as do you. i know it won't be any other way. you continue to show up when i least expect it, and disappear just as quickly. but, i've learned to hold on. perhaps there's a method to the madness as to why it happens when it does. you're there when i need you most. to help me through. every time, you appear out of thin air when i need you to. to clean up the mess someone else has made. to make me whole again.